Grumpy

Why am I so grumpy all the time?

Could it be that I am pregnant with twins? Or is that I have 7 month old at home who is teething? Maybe it's my 11 1/2 year old pre-teen? Possibly the two hours of drive time I have everyday to go to and from work through downtown Atlanta? Who knows but I am a grouch! Everyday. All week. Since about 6 weeks ago. There are no two ways about it! I am no longer a nice person. It is what it is and I feel bad at the end of the day - I really do. I feel bad for the guy at the McDonald's drive through that I yelled at because my Egg McMuffin was burnt. I feel bad for the guy at the pharmacy who didn't have the RX that I needed to get filled. I feel bad for my daughter who doesn't deserve to get snapped at every time she comes within 10 feet of me and lastly, I feel bad for my husband - who in the back of my mind I blame for my situation and hence my bad mood. I know it's not his fault - we did this together - and I know there isn't anything that he can do to make things better I just wish I understood why this pregnancy is so different from my other two. I am so tired - so very, very tired - all the time. No matter how much sleep I get I just want to sleep more. I am always hungry but never feel good and lastly - and this is the big one - I have the craziest cravings that I can't seem to control! I will wake up at 2 in the morning and want Chinese Food and then all I can think about is Chinese Food and how soon can I get some! Same goes for Taco Bell, Big Macs, Ice Cream, Etc. Along with these issues I already have trouble sleeping, back pain, morning-noon & night sickness and a few other unpleasantness that I'll keep to myself :-)

I am so torn because I now I know that I am not the girl that likes to be pregnant and I still have many months to go. I will never be the glowing mom that runs around gymboree saying how wonderful i is to be pregnant and I wish I could be pregnant all the time. That is not me. When I was trying for so many years to get pregnant I thought that it would be me but now I know it's now :-) That being said I also know what it's going to be like when the babies are born and if I remember correctly the first few month's are no roll in the hay either and that's with 1 baby so I am sure I have no idea what to expect with the arrival of 2. I do however think that once the babies are born I will be just as tired (if not more) and I may even be just as crabby. The other pregnancy symptoms should go away :-)

Most of you that read this blog have had babies - is each pregnancy really that different or is it just because it's twins? How were your pregnancies?

For those of you that have twins - is this like a preview of what's to come? Difficult Pregnancy = Difficult Babies? Do you know of any good books I can get that talk about twin pregnancies and preparation for twins that don't scare you to death?